Through a comment on a writing website, I had the good fortune to meet artist (and writer) Deborah Moss. I immediately fell in love with her work, and soon commissioned a painting which she titled Stars Make Me Teary Eyed.
This week, Deborah held her second giveaway on her Facebook page. It was for a puzzle-piece style brooch, and I didn’t win BUT because she is such a generous and inspiring lady, she has gifted me another brooch: New Growth.
New Growth couldn’t be more apt this week.
The year I began my writing journey (2013, in case you’re wondering) my partner gave me Tony Robbins’ Personal Power audio set to listen to. In between writing sessions, I’d listen. I found his ideas nothing short of revolutionary, as they married so well with where I was at the time and spurred me towards action.
One of the points that stuck with me was that change only happens from a sense of dissatisfaction – ’cause if we’re satisfied with our lives, we’re not going to change, are we?
Well, over the past several months I’ve felt a huge sense of dissatisfaction. I didn’t explore it much because I didn’t want to face the fact that writing may not be as fulfilling for me as I thought it would be. I needn’t have worried. The dissatisfaction was not about writing or publishing, but rather it was a dissatisfaction of my lifestyle, energy levels and lack of optimism.
As it’s school holidays, I’ve been off the day job for the last two weeks. Among other things, it’s given me time to think about what I want out of life, and out of writing – and what I have to offer. I’ve been able to try things out and create a lifestyle goal for myself. There’s a change in the winds, and I’m allowing it to take me with it.
In allowing this new growth, I’m experiencing growing pains. Some things belong in my old life. As I become more confident about what I want, my old lifestyle no longer serves me as it used to. There is no place (or at least, very little place) for doubting whether I’m ‘good enough’, worrying what other people think or indulging in self-pity.
It’s hard letting go of things that have been a part of me for so long, even if they’re not things that serve me well. But I’m moving forward, and I’m building a new lifestyle for myself. It’s a lifestyle that serves me better than my old one, and a lifestyle that will be replaced in its own time.
And what is this lifestyle? Good food and exercise, inspiring company, creative exploration and a go-getter attitude.
I’ll post in more detail about my writing/art lifestyle later. In the meantime, here’s to new growth *clinks teacup* 🙂